


In Another World

by Windsofwinter



Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Angst, F/F, Solitract!Clara
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-03
Updated: 2018-12-03
Packaged: 2019-09-06 08:46:22
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 984
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16829122
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Windsofwinter/pseuds/Windsofwinter
Summary: “I want more than anything for this to be real, but its not, and you don’t have to take that form to make me stay, because you were phenomenal on your own, but we can’t exist together.” She feels tears sting awkwardly at her eyes. “Just like me and Clara, I have to let her go, and you have to let me go.”A short "what if" scene with the Solitract taking Clara's form.Spoilers for 11x09 "It takes you away"





	In Another World

**Author's Note:**

> So the frog was cute and very Doctor Who but I must confess I was ready to be emotionally destroyed by a previous companion and/or River. This short un-beta'd mess is the result of that. I apologise for any mistakes and the mess in general I just had a lot of feelings. 
> 
> I don't own Doctor Who.

“You have to let me go.” The Doctor all but begs the Solitract, feeling the universe around her collapsing, her body shaking with it.

“You’re just saying that because you want to leave.” The universe replies, its form of the frog gazing up and the Doctor.

The white walls around them continue to tremor, almost caving in as the ground shakes horribly, the Doctor almost falls, catching herself on a nearby support beam. Her eyes dart around, searching for something, anything that could help. Desperation clogs in her throat, she never thought it would end like this.

“Please, I need to get back to my friends.” She tries again.

“It doesn’t have to be this way, we are friends Doctor, I can be anyone you want me to be.”

For a moment the ground seems to stop shaking as the white walls disappear, becoming something familiar, the Tardis seems to grow around them, and the Doctor follows every movement with her eyes, fascinated that such a thing could happen, despite the fear of death, it truly was phenomenal. She runs her hands over the familiar console, the detail perfect, so wrapped up in her own world she doesn’t notice the Solitract no longer holds the form of a frog.

She looks up, to beg for her, and the Solitract’s life again, that’s when she sees her, she registers her eyes first, still wide and expressive, an excited glint in them as she stares back. Her hair was still short, it swished slightly as she moved, her lips turned up in a grin. The Doctor briefly wonders how old the leather jacket still resting on her shoulders must be. She looked exactly the same as in her memory, in her dreams, her Clara. She always did light up a room.

Expect the jacket isn’t old, because it isn’t real, the excited glint in her eye and her soft smile are slightly off, because no matter how much she cherishes the memories she got back, sometimes they aren’t quite right, as all memories are. Its not her Clara.

Despite this, despite knowing that its all a fantasy, one that will get her killed she finds herself walking forward, her hands reaching out for her impossible girl, somehow more impossible in this moment than before. Clara isn’t here, and yet, they were right, Erik and Graham, its real enough, she’s real enough. She stops just before she can reach her, her hands suspended in the air, unsure of what to do, only faintly aware of the shaking resuming around them.

Not-Clara smiles, just like she used to and tugs the Doctor forward into a hug, startling her for a moment before she reciprocates. Clara’s perfume is slightly off too but its close enough to bring the familiar warmth back to the Doctor’s hearts. She buries her face in Clara’s shoulder, choking back the sobs, feeling half way to complete again, even if just for a moment. A moment that may kill her, and an entire universe. Someone had once told her to be a time lord was to be alone, to die alone. Perhaps this is more than what she deserves, an almost Clara, a mirage of a past love to hold her in death.

“You’ve redecorated.” Not-Clara whispers into the Doctor’s ear, her voice painfully familiar. “I think I like it.”

The Doctor chokes out a sound that is halfway between a sob and a laugh.

“Last time you saw me I was a white-haired Scotsman, but you’re talking about the furniture.” The Doctor mumbles into Clara’s shoulder, trying to ignore the fact the inaccuracy could be less of a Clara quirk and more of a Solitract mistake. 

Clara seems to squeeze her tighter at that.

“You’re all the Doctor to me.” She whispers in reply, her voice taking on a desperate tone as the interior of the Tardis seems to crack. “and we can just stay here now, the Doctor and Clara Oswald in the Tardis, like it’s supposed to be, remember?”

The Doctor pulls way slightly and takes in the surroundings, she has mere minutes, she gently cups Clara’s face in her hands, her eyes scanning every detail, desperate for it to just be real, for just a moment longer. Clara places her hand over the Doctor’s and leans into her touch, unshed tears in her eyes. She doesn’t want to pull away, for once she wants to stay, and to hell with the consequences, but she has a duty of care to her team, her team who were still in the anti-zone. Her Clara, the real Clara would know that, respect that.

“I do, and its clever, very clever, you taking a form I could never say no to, never walk away from.” The Doctor says backing away slightly, her hearts breaking at the look on not-Clara’s face. Her mind begins to chant a chorus of ‘it’s not really her.’. “So much so that she had to wipe my memories to make me let her go, and if she can do that, then I can do this.” The Doctor straightens up slightly, her eyes not meeting the ones that were almost perfectly Clara’s. “I want more than anything for this to be real, but its not, and you don’t have to take that form to make me stay, because you were phenomenal on your own, but we can’t exist together.” She feels tears sting awkwardly at her eyes. “Just like me and Clara, I have to let her go, and you have to let me go.”

“I’m sorry.” Solitract Clara whispers, taking a step back.

“I won’t forget you, just like I won’t forget my Clara, the real Clara.” The Doctor nods slightly as she speaks. "You will always be my friend."

“I’ll dream of you, out there, without me.” The Solitract says finally, before pushing the Doctor out, back into the anti-zone.


End file.
